What are the questions I must ask to be involved as the clergy in a civil marriage?

 

Question:

My sister, who is not religious, is engaged to be married. She wants to do a civil marriage this fall and to have the Jewish marriage next summer. For the Jewish marriage she does not intend to use an orthodox rabbi. For her civil marriage, the courts are closed but permit a marriage certificate completed by clergy with one other witness. I have smicha and she asked if I could serve as that minister/clergy. I have not investigated the lineage (yichus) of the groom. What are the questions I must ask to be involved as the clergy in a civil marriage? The form and certificate do not ask the clergy to validate any conditions. Rather, the form requires only names and contact information.

 

Answer:

A central issue with your participation would be the implications it has in facilitating or granting legitimacy to their intended marriage process. For example, your presiding over the civil ceremony will culminate in a religious marriage ceremony in the future which is not in accordance with halacha. Furthermore, it is possible that the civil marriage will facilitate the couple living together as husband and wife more than they would without the civil marriage, and this would be outside the framework of taharas hamishpacha, and outside the framework of a halachic marriage. Furthermore, the whole basis for your involvement in this process is your semicha, but it is being used to facilitate a wedding process which runs contrary to what your semicha is intended to uphold. Lastly, consideration must be given to the fact that, should the need arise in the future, a dissolution of this civil marriage could have complex halachic ramifications by the fact that you were involved as an orthodox rabbi.

The only basis for your involvement would seem to be if a) the couple are just proceeding now with the civil marriage purely for the paperwork purposes and not to actually live together yet as husband and wife, and b) that they commit to a halachic wedding in the future. In that case, it would be certainly appropriate to investigate the issues of yichus. However, this is a complex area of halacha which requires expertise and experience, and not for a novice in such matters. The correct way to approach this would be to investigate the yichus through an experienced Rov or Beis Din. Many Rabbonim and Battei Dinim provide such a service; it involves the prospective couple completing a detailed questionnaire and providing supporting documentation which is then used to verify the couple’s halachic suitability for each other.

 

 

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