I keep on forgetting to say Bli Neder

 

Question:

A lot of times I say that I’ll do things and forget to say bli neder, and each time I’m worried that it might have been a neder. Is there any type of Tenai I could make that would take away these concerns?

 

Answer:

A neder does not take effect until there is a definite and final decision to do something. Also, if it isn’t a Mitzva, it is not considered a neder.

While there is a Tenai, or moda’ah as we have a Minhag to say at Hataras Nedarim on Erev Rosh Hashana, one cannot rely on it completely regarding a full-fledged neder, but rather primarily concerning Hanhagos Tovos where no explicit condition was made that they be bli neder or the like.

There is a common phenomenon today of anxiety regarding nedarim, and one must be careful about this, as it is neither healthy nor justified. As stated, not every plan is considered a neder.

 

 

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